I’ve been working on improving at chess. I initially learned it in high school but didn’t know anyone to play against, and back then there was no accessible way to play online, so I didn’t really have the chance to practice.
I’ve been also watching the show “The Queen’s Gambit” on Netflix — essentially about an orphan girl who discovers she is a prodigy at chess (plus other complications that aren’t relevant here).
In as much of the show as I’ve watched so far, she’s only lost maybe twice, both times against some of the best players out there. And yet, each time she is inconsolably upset.
I actually kind of think it sets up a bad precedent. it teaches us that losing is inherently a bad thing and should be avoided at all costs. And then when we do lose, we think there’s no point of even trying and so just give up.
One thing I’ve learned while practicing at chess is that losing is part of the process. If you don’t lose, you don’t learn where you can get better. Winning is fun, but if you win all the time, you’ll get overconfident and think you have nothing to improve.
Sure, you could always play weaker players and so virtually guarantee you’ll always win. But what would be the point? You’d never actually get any better.
Even the greatest grandmasters of the game lose, regularly. The difference is that they just know it’ll help them to get even stronger. No matter if they win or lose, it’s OK: win, and there’s a reason to celebrate; lose, and they’ve just identified a place they need to study more.
I realize the same is true about life.
You have to accept that failing is part of the process. If you are never willing to fail, you’ll never learn what you can do better. This applies to the law of attraction as much as anything else.
But I’ve also known people to play it small because they are too afraid to reach for the big things they really want. I’ve seen people convince themselves out of big desires, because it was too scary or they felt they “shouldn’t” want it.
I know, this might sound trite. But I’ve been seeing the limitation in my own thinking at times, and that of others. I realize how much we hold ourselves back with our own refusal to think big.
if you only reach for the small manifestations, sure, perhaps they’ll come a lot easier.
But, what would be the point if you intentionally keep yourself small? You came here to explore the limitations of this reality, and manifesting slightly better jobs, slightly higher income, slightly nicer vacations, etc, is nowhere close to approaching the limitations of what is possible.
You didn’t come here to get by, but to thrive. You came to give birth to big desires and then to allow them to manifest. You came to stretch reality beyond where it’s ever been before.
Will you fail sometimes? Obviously you will.
But just like the chess player who benefits whether they win or lose, so nothing has truly ever gone wrong. It’s OK for the chess player to lose because they’re focused on their vision of getting better. And it’s OK for you to fail, because you should always be focused on getting closer and closer to what you desire.
So be willing to fail. Fail as many times as it takes. Because each time, you’ll discover what you could have done better, how you could align even more with your desire — and so in failing, you’ll get even closer to its manifestation.
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